Memories

I was 18 and starting college for the first time. It was late summer and the air felt fresh, felt new. I met you for the first time at my friend’s apartment. When you walked in, you took me by surprise; you took my breath away. As usual, a suit and tie, and fancy black shoes. Your hair was gelled back, and you had on a perfect beard. I had to look away; I felt timid, I felt little. Not only were you 5 years above mine, but your life was so advanced compared to mine. Here I was, first year in college, and there you were; PhD in the making. I remember that day as if it were yesterday. You walked in full of confidence, full of je ne sais quoi. You introduced yourself to me “Hi A, I’m R” and immediately sat on the chair next to the window to smoke a cigarette. Our night ended once we were done chatting in the park, and we parted ways. However… Little did I know…


It soon became a ritual. Every Saturday we would both go to our friend’s apartment to hang out, chat, and play some games. The only reason why I constantly went to her house was due to your presence, and I was the reason for you going as well. We became an item quickly once we knew each other; we were a great duo. Each and every single time our lips touched one another, it felt like fireworks. There was passion, I could not mistake it for anything else. This was it. This was it.


We were soon inseparable.
I did anything for you. I understood your lifestyle, and fit mine into yours. I felt like it was something good. I know you felt the same way. You always told me how beautiful I was, and you would call me your sweetheart. The way you said it, with your accent, it sounded like “hi sweet heart”, you never sounded them together. You were irresistible to me, you were exactly everything I wanted in a man. And I always reminded you of that fact. 


But the end came near, and it took me by surprise. We were together for 6 months - it felt longer, it should have been longer. It didn’t stop you from coming back to me for the next two years.
What if? 
What if I came back too? How would things be today? I can only imagine, and each time I do, I see myself staring at my phone thinking about what to message you.